Archive for December, 2009

A Mother’s Thoughts

Friday, December 25th, 2009

Dear Malia, 

I know this is your blog but I wanted to tell you that on this Christmas Eve as I look at the stars shining above I can only think of you. An angel brought from the heavens above delivered into my arms to take care of and love.  This will be your second Christmas!

Since the day I found out I was carrying you in my tummy a smile came across my face. I dreamed of the day we would finally meet. My love for you was just beginning. The moment I saw your beautiful sweet face my heart molded with yours. You are my sweet angel. You bring me joy every day. You have more courage and soul than anyone I have ever met. You are my teacher in so many ways. You teach me everyday what it means to be strong. You have made me wiser, more compassionate, and have truly taught me the  meaning of love.  You have brought me to my knees with worry for you but YOU always have shown ME the way.  Please continue to do so! My little angel with such a wise soul and deep brown eyes. I could stare into them forever.  

My little torito! You are so strong. You have fought and conquered so many battles in such a short time in your life! You amaze me everyday by your strength and courage! My sweet angel you are a fighter, and tan valiente! I will always stand by your side forever.

The angels were singing the day you were born, you are such a sweet blessing.You are an angel Malia. Your golden locks and porcelain face are that of nothing but an angel.  I thank God everyday for you.  To wake up beside you on Christmas day will be the best present ever. Your smile that  lights a room and melts my heart will be the most beautiful thing to behold.  

Merry Christmas my sweet baby girl…. Your mommy loves you more than you could ever possibly know. 

Love mom

My G tube surgery

Saturday, December 12th, 2009

November 28, 2009

At 4am the alarm went off. My mom and dad were already awake. Neither one of them could sleep so good that night but I was sleeping peacefully as finally the NG tube was out from my nose. Off we went to CIMA me still in my pyjamas. We arrived at 5am and were admitted to the hospital. We all went into the surgery room as I was getting prepped for my surgery. The anesthesiologist showed up and wanted to talk to my parents about what she had planned on giving me. After that, my mom put me in my surgery gown and the other doctors showed up as well. There was a team of four doctors and two nurses that would be helping with my g tube placement. My pediatrician Dr. Castro took me in her arms and said goodbye to my parents. My mom and dad were nervous to say the least but felt confident in the team that was looking after me.

About 45 minutes later, Dr. Navarro the pediatric surgeon came in to tell my parents that the surgery had been a success. He also said you know your daughter she woke up  kicking and wanting her mom and dad. The doctors had decided I would stay in ICU over night. Everything had been going great until I was adminsitered Valporic Acid intravenously. You see my g tube site could not be used for 24 hours and my parents were worried about me not getting my anti seizure drugs. We had been told by the neurologist that a different form of Valporic Acid was available via IV. Unfortunately my little body did not like it and I had side effects from the drug. I was very agitated and irritable. I was thrashing around my arms and head and it did not matter the amount of sedatives they were giving me as I would not calm down. 

My parents were extremely worried and so was the pediatrician. She gave me a drug called Fentanyl that hopefully would calm me down so that I could relax and get some sleep. My mom was holding me when she gave me the drug. All of a sudden my O2 level dropped from 97 to 55 in a matter of seconds. I started gasping for air. I could not breathe. My mom picked me up and put me in the crib and the doctor then took over. It was nuts. Before this there were probably 10 people working in ICU but at this time there was only one nurse around and he just did not seem to be moving fast enough. My mom was barking orders at him and telling him to get some more help. My doctor was trying to resuscitate me and was yelling for the antidote of the drug she had just given me. It was very scary. The next thing I am hearing CODE BLUE IN ICU!!!! My mom was a wreck, my dad never left my side. My mom was running around trying to find help and to her it seemed like an eternity for anyone to show up with the antidote. Now all of a sudden there were 10 people in the room and everyone was helping to save me. Whew, I started to breathe again.  

I was only to be in ICU for one night. I had to stay for three. After the Valproic incident and the drug finally left my system I started to feel better. They started to wean me off the other drugs that were in me and I had a problem with that. I was agitated and irritable again. I cried alot that day. As a matter of fact I cried from 5pm till 4:30 am… They tried everything from Morphine, to Dormicum to finally Hydro Clorate and that finally did the trick and I fell asleep at last. My parents were exhausted to say the least and me too.

The next day I was much better. Our goal was to get me out of ICU and up into a room. We finally made it upstairs and out of ICU. I was off of oxygen and the pulse monitor. I slept two nights upstairs and did very well. The nurses showed my parents how to clean my g tube site and how to feed me. They got the hang of it real quick. We finally left the hospital on December 3rd. We stayed at our same hotel and mom and I were flying out on Friday for home!!!! Dad took the ferry again and my mom and I arrived home by noon on Friday! I was so glad to be home and to tell you the truth I am doing so much better.

Thanks to all the doctors and nurses who looked out for me and from all the support from my family and friends. Love Malia